Is it Done Yet?

How do you know when you’re ready to publish something you feel absolutely compelled to write? For memoir writers, especially, this question is paramount. This week I watched Michele Cushatt interviewed by Emily Freeman of Hope Writers and found answers that helped me move forward with one of my memoir projects.

Another memoir guru, Marion Roach Smith, says that memoir is about something you know after something you’ve been through. And how do we know anything? For writers, that usually means scribbling our thoughts and feelings for sometimes years to get at the meaning that Cushatt says makes our suffering worth it. Yes, until I can clearly express the significance of an incident, a relationship, a trauma, a season of my life, I’m not ready to put down my pen nor file it in my memory as a done deal.

Cushatt’s basic question concerning publishing is: are you still writing for your own catharsis, or are you  writing out of compassion to connect with others who may have suffered as you have? This is not an easy answer because this transition, for me anyway, came in stages.

What I enjoyed so much about Cushatt’s interview was what I’ll call her publishing readiness checklist. If any of the following are true, then you’re not ready to publish:

Are you still volatile on the topic?

Defensive?

Desperate to talk and write about it.

Do you still feel confused or wounded?

Do you need the approval of your reader? What if someone disagrees or can’t connect with your topic?

Are you healed and in a stable place?

I spent years within all these categories. Somehow, I always found a way to include my issues in a conversation. And was I volatile? You bet. And if you disagreed with me, let me tell you a thing or two! And yet I was still so confused about why I felt so broken, bruised, and desperate to have my story published even before it was completely written. I needed someone else, my listener, my reader, to validate me, to say yeah, you’re right. You were the victim and the other guys; they were the villains. If you are where I was, then according to Cushatt wait a while to pursue publishing.

But she adds, even when it’s not time to publish, it’s always time to write because writing is what brings clarity and clarity ushers in healing as we are able to name our hurts, desires and needs to the Lord, the God who sees. In my own experience, until I’m able to surrender my scars to the Lord, I’m not able to forgive. I’ve heard the definition of unforgiveness as drinking poison and expecting your enemy to drop dead. Only when I relinquish those who’ve hurt me to God’s justice, am I able to get well and move on.

This is the moment when you’re ready to think about publishing. Back to Roach Smith, what do I know now that I didn’t know before I went through the episode I want to share? What I learned is my theme. Be sure you can put it in a concise sentence or two.

And who needs to know? They are my audience. This is the harder question of the two for me. Who needs to know? Doesn’t everybody? Yes, but no book is for everybody. Ask yourself perhaps, why did I need to know this? What misconceptions or lies was I living under prior to the incident, that I now see differently? Who might share those misconceptions?  What hurt the most about my incident? See if you can name it in one word. Who else might be hurt by the same word? Why? Now you’re getting closer. This is the reader you can serve. Cushatt suggests creating a kind of avatar. What do they look like, how old are they? Keep them in mind as you move onto the next step.

What is the objective of your book? What are you offering your reader specifically for their benefit? There can be more than one thing, but they must be few, related, and succinct. Cushatt cautions, every  part of your story must meet your objective. If it doesn’t, you’re off the map. A reader who finds him/herself wandering for meaning may lose interest.

Understanding your objective is especially important for a writer of memoir because a memoir contains no overt takeaways but trusts the reader to find them on their own within the narrative. This is why I love to read memoir. No preachy inserts. No pre-digested thinking, only intact story that draws me in until I’m living vicariously with the author, elbow to elbow, thought to thought, feeling to feeling. So, your memoir must be tighter than tight. Every detail pointing toward the epiphanies you hope for your reader. This is a tall order for any author, but it’s what differentiates writing from literature, and literature is what lasts because it connects universally through lyric specifics.

So, thank you Michele Cushatt, Emily Freeman, and Marion Roach Smith. And fellow writers, I hope this moves you, like it did me, closer to publishing worth publication.